Factors of Divorce
In recent years, divorce is
becoming more and more common; however, it is not as common (or inevitable) as
people think. It is believed that 50% of all couples who get married will end
up having a divorce at some point. This is not true. The reason this is
believed is because there is data for it, but this data is distorted because it
was not gathered correctly. The actual percentage of people who marry and get a
divorce is only 24%, and 76% of people who marry will be married to the same
person until one of them passes away. This is a big difference from what people
think of when they think of divorces.
There are many factors that can
go into the decision to get a divorce. Compulsivity is a big factor in divorce,
due to the fact that people can be very compulsive and want one thing one
minute and something else the next. In fact, 70% of people who chose to have a
divorce said that they wished they would have worked (harder) to save their
marriage. They think that it was something they should have done. Another word
for compulsivity is impulsivity, and people can be very impulsive and do things
without thinking it all the way through.
Another factor is young age; however, just because you marry
young does not mean that you are likely to get a divorce. I know several people
who married young and are still happily married years later. When you marry
young, you also have the chance to have more children. Regardless of these
things, the decision of marriage is big at any age, but some people may feel
that it is better made when they are older. If people get married young, they
may feel like they made a mistake and they want to undo it, which leads to a
divorce.
An additional factor is if one or both of the spouse’s parents
have had a divorce. This is because it can carry over into their own marriage,
since it has been advertised for them in their home. People learn and take away
a number of things from their parents, even if they do not realize it.
Other factors involve sex, both pre-marital and extra marital.
They can both cause problems within the marriage in different ways. Along with this
is also cohabitation prior to marriage. This is the cultural approach to
prepare for marriage, even though it ends up causing more problems than if they
had just lived separately before getting married. This is because people that
cohabit are often used to separation in their lives—they have their own things
and ways of doing things. When they get married, it may be hard to change that
separation mindset that they have lived with for a period of time. When you
cohabit, there is usually a mine/yours deal and when you marry those become
ours. It is quite often an uneasy transition and it sometimes does not work.
It is important to keep in
mind that divorce is not always the wrong choice because it can sometimes be the
right decision for a couple or a family—but it is an extremely big decision,
either way. There are costs of divorce that
are often not thought of when choosing to get a divorce. Many
problems will still arise even if they are not together because they still
spent a part of their life with them. Due to this, it is important to remember that getting a
divorce does not mean that you are getting unmarried because that is something
that will never change.
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